this whole farce, redesigning, tweaking, nudging, calling upon various obscure and eldritch powers to give my blog some semblence of coherence is nothing more than a visual manifestation of my errant questing in search of another selfdefinition. id like to think it is helping, but honestly i have not a clue. in my struggle to define it is quite possible that i have instead neglected fundamental physical signs of my hidden self. strange phenomenon. saint elmo’s fire of the mind. supposedly everyone goes through life trying to discover themselves but i like to think i spend more time at it than most and therefore have a jump on people. warning bells and klaxons at this point. what i am going to attempt is to cut back on the ouroborous that is my life at this point and give myself a trajectory of some sort. altogether vague at this point, perhaps getting into a settled crosstraining schedule to prepare for the fencing season. that sounds like a good start. as always a female companion would be nice, but at the same time i have no desire to start anything with one and even less time with which to do it. so training it is. i am going to put the longterm big picture who does adam want to create himself as goals on the veritable backburner of ambition and concentrate on the shorter term adam needs to be a more disciplined and confident person goals.
“Think of what is right and true…become aware of what is not obvious…do not do anything useless.” ‑Miyamoto Musashi The Book of Five Rings