I’ve got contacts again after a three year hiatus. So now I’m even more stunningly handsome than I was while wearing spectacles. The contacts are pretty expensive—about $200 for a six month supply.
Supposedly each pair will only last a month. I have my doubts. I bet they’ll last 6 times as long if I care for them correctly. Most of the wear on the lenses comes from loose eyeflesh and blinking. I don’t blink much, and I’ve been scraping my eyes with razorblades to reduce the amount of loose eyeflesh. Plus, I’m only going to wear my contacts when I need someone to find me stunningly handsome or when I’ll be wanting to wear sunglasses. To facilitate my stunningly handsomeness, I should probably keep my facial hair a bit less pigglywiggly, iron my shirts, and not scarf my food. So, nevermind. I’ll just go the scruffy and sloppily dressed route and digust all the women. But I’ll have contacts at least.
The reason I stopped wearing contacts is because they couldn’t be weighted correctly to fit on my eye. The lenses had a central ballast. These new ones have a three ballasts arrayed almost laterally; the two on the edges of the lens are a bit higher than the central. That makes ’em less likely to rotate around the eye. That is helpful considering how astimgatic I am. I’m glad it is Friday.