Wherefore Art Thou, WiFi?

I’m cur­rent­ly in the back­woods of Indi­ana. [Noblesville to be pre­cise. Hamil­ton coun­ty is one of the rich­est and fastest grow­ing coun­ties in the nation, but it still feel like back­woods because] My aunt and uncle still depend on AOL dial-up for inter­net access, but I’m cur­rent­ly steal­ing WiFi from one of the $400k clone­hous­es that are creep­ing ever-clos­er to this turn of the cen­tu­ry farm house. I’m con­sis­tent­ly hap­py that I spent the extra bills for a more pow­er­ful receiv­er. My cousin is get­ting mar­ried lat­er today, and there is an open bar at the recep­tion.