The day after I got the keys to my house the previous owner showed up unexpectedly and invited himself inside. He’s an old Lebanese dude, and very attached to the house. I probably could have gotten $5k less on the price if they hadn’t felt so sentimental about the place. Anyway, this guy told me he’d show me what the keys were for. I told him that I had it under control but he was rather insistent. So we went inside. I thought he was going to tell me to get the hell out of his house, or punch me when he saw that all the carpet was gone. He was seriously offended.
“Why did you tear up the carpet!?”
“I want wood floors.”
“It was less than three years old!”
*indifferent silence*
He then proceeded to grab all the keys and show me what went where. Amy got my friend Sandy on the phone and she pretended to be my landlord so we could get rid of the dude. Amy was great at ushering him out. I’m just not assertive enough at stuff like that. I feel rude. Hopefully he won’t be coming back all the time. I’m certainly going to change all of my locks though. He probably saved a set, since there were about 30 keys on the kitchen counter when I got the place. The last thing I want is to come home from work to find him lounging in my living room.